Sometimes I lie

“How are you today?”
“Good.” I shortly reply with blood shot eyes holding back tears and hair a mess.

The truth is, we all lie, everyday. Small little lies that we tell to maintain the peace, to maintain the illusion of ‘normal.’ Why? Maybe out of the compulsory need to obey the norms set forth by society. Maybe because we don’t want to invite the unsolicited advice or pity from strangers, friends or family voraciously have to share. Pride and ego are designed to protect our fragile identities we struggle to keep. They protect our fear of playing victim or letting someone into our darkness will deem us lesser. Less strong, less human, less attractive, etc.

It is more admirable to keep your composure in work, in relationships, in all situations that find any form of negative thought or feeling that may impede the status quo of ‘normal.’

It’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to feel down or upset sometimes. If you allow yourself the room to feel and understand why you are where you are, then maybe, just maybe you stand a fighting chance to put those demons you wrestle with at bay. A chance to identify your triggers or what emptiness that lies below the surface that you may be able to learn to fill yourself.

You see, if you let the darkness consume you and hide the skeletons in your closet, then that pain will never go away. They’ll forever hide just below the surface and when you least expect it show up and rear its ugly head; and that’s what they call “self sabotage.” Whatever outlet you choose to learn how to manage your pain, whether its talking with a friend, therapy, exercise or soul searching, I commend you for trying. For not letting the small lies you tell yourself everyday define you. For not letting the darkness consume you and steal your glow.

What ever your glow is, find it, and hold onto it for dear life because there are so many people and entities out there trying to steal it.

Glow Up

Mental Health Resources

Author: V

Delray Beach, Fl. 30 years old. Senior Business Executive. Writer. Wanderluster. Life Long Learner. Hopeless Romantic.

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